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Exploring Humanity: Through the Eyes of Another

Seeing Myself Through Others


"The very essence of my being is the continuous movement of incorporating 'what is not me' into myself."
— Uchida Tatsuru

My father grew up in a household that was far from wealthy.

As the eldest son, sandwiched between six older sisters and a younger brother, he was likely burdened with responsibilities from an early age. His way out was through education—studying diligently in the hopes of escaping his circumstances. Though he was academically gifted, he likely chose a university that fit within the family’s means, making the most pragmatic choice rather than the most ambitious one. Independence came swiftly—by the age of 20, he had completely separated from financial dependence on his family.

Shortly after graduating, he secured a job and was just beginning to adjust to the working world when an even greater responsibility fell upon him: fatherhood. At just 24, the weight of becoming a parent must have felt overwhelming. But societal expectations and external pressures led him to accept the role, marking the start of a lifelong journey shaped by responsibility. This initial burden may have been the very foundation upon which he built his resilience—using duty as the driving force to withstand life's many challenges.

The best way to describe my father’s personality is: "Generous to others but harsh on himself."
In other words, he is deeply considerate of others but struggles to extend that same kindness to himself. His generosity has likely been a strength in his relationships—he always considers the feelings of those around him, ensuring his actions do not inconvenience anyone. He never rushes to judge others for their mistakes, nor does he freely express personal opinions that might influence or burden others. He avoids boasting, believing that pride can be a subtle assertion of superiority. This quality, in many ways, earned him the respect of his colleagues.

However, his strict self-discipline sometimes extended to his family, making life difficult at home. Since he saw his family as an extension of himself, the same harsh standards he held for himself were often imposed on us. This led to moments of tension, as the emotional contrast between his outward gentleness and inward strictness became apparent.

For over 30 years, he has woken up at 6 AM, worked tirelessly until late in the evening, and refused to waste a single moment. Now, as he approaches retirement, one might expect him to slow down—but he refuses to do so. Despite countless pleas from his family to “please take a break,” I know that asking him to stop is futile. His relentless drive is a part of who he is.

Perhaps I recognize that same trait in myself.

Now, as I step out of my comfort zone to prepare for my own next chapter, I find myself walking a path not so different from his.

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